There are SO many things that we are taught to say, do and believe, that we never question.
Often as parents we find ourselves repeating things that were said to us by our parents (and others). We repeat axioms that “everyone believes” and the people around us nod their heads.
It’s empowering, exciting, and somewhat disorienting, to realize how many of these social constructs are not necessarily true.
Most parents will tell their children that it is a good thing to always try hard. Often, they will say they don’t need their child to get straight A’s, but that “all that matters is that you try your best”. Why do we believe this to be true? Why is it “better” to try hard than to not try?
Of course, we are more likely to succeed at something if we try hard, but that’s about adaptation (what works for a particular situation) rather than “good” or “bad”. We could suggest to our children that trying hard is more likely to lead to a desired outcome (like training to win a race) but it could be the same as we might tell them if they want to walk from Maleny to Toowoomba they need to head south.
Maybe it’s neither “good” nor “bad”. Maybe the person who tries hard is no more valuable than the person who doesn’t try at all.
We’re all just humans doing our best to survive and have happy days, and this could be one less measure of arbitrary judgment we could remove to help us (and to teach our children) to embrace each other regardless of our individual differences/ethos.
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