
Dr. Bob’s Reflections

November 2023: Medical Elitism
Someone goes to their GP complaining about chest pains, and the GP refers the person for tests. They might get an ECG,...
October 2023: A Parable
Years ago, someone shared this parable with me and I reflect on it all the time. There was a remote village in Japan...
September 2023: “Eating Disorders” and Train Wrecks
It’s pretty widely known that I do not believe in psychiatric diagnoses and do not believe the people I work with have...
August 2023: Children’s Self-Efficacy and Anxiety
I work with a lot of young adults (14-23) and have always dealt with their ambivalence and fears about becoming...
July 2023: Trust Issues
Many intimate relationships are compromised, or even destroyed, by one or both people having “trust issues”. ...
June 2023: Hypocrisy
I’m sure all of us, at some point, could legitimately be accused of hypocrisy. But when hypocrisy is on a grand...
May 2023: Lawyer Fees
With so much of my work involving post-separation co-parenting, I am constantly struck by the outrageous amounts of...
April 2023: Set It Down
I’ve been thinking a lot about a metaphor that has probably been used by others. It’s a way of thinking about the...
March 2023: Artifacts of Traditional Parenting on the Road
Recently, I was driving home from getting groceries. I was stopped behind a van at a stoplight. I could not see who...
February 2023: Apologies
Traditional parents will sometimes demand that their children say things like “I’m sorry” when the parents feel the...
January 2023: Where to look to “fix things”?
Once upon a time, there was a couple that lived in a beautiful house. One day they noticed that some of their door...
December 2022: Child Protection versus Family Court
I have written extensively, here and elsewhere, about how family court is a destructive process for children. What...
November 2022: Questioning
One of the (countless) amazing opportunities we have as parents is we can open our children’s eyes to different ways...
October 2022: The Dark Side of Imagination
Sometimes I find myself confronted by my own ideas that I myself don’t like. One of these times was when I...
September 2022: Living Like An Animal
Humans can be very arrogant in believing we are the “superior” species on this planet. I think it’s worth questioning....
August 2022: The Door to co-Parenting
If decades of experience working with post separation co-parenting have taught me anything, it is that children want...
July 2022: What We Don’t Know
I am constantly amazed at what I call “the arrogance of the Zeitgeist”. Every generation feels they have got all the...
June 2022: Domestic Violence Part 2
Even though we never actually do anything about it, it is popular in 2022 for everyone to “speak out” against domestic...
May 2022: Domestic Violence Part 1
This is the first of a two part series on domestic violence. Each part will highlight the main victims of domestic...
April 2022: Winning
I was just reading a headline announcing the winners of the 2022 Screen Actors Guild (SAG) awards, and it struck me...
March 2022: Perspective
My favourite podcast tells stories of lesser known or forgotten events in history. Today I was listening to it and it...
February 2022: How much evidence do we need to recognize a “big lie”?
In the early 1970's, a Stanford University psychologist named David Rosenhan was introduced to the "anti-psychiatry"...
January 2022: Civility
In the 1950’s, there was an American politician named Joseph McCarthy who was accusing virtually everyone of being a...
December 2021: Judgment: Part Two
DISCLAIMER: This reflection is about understanding the historical roots of judgment in our society and in parenting....
November 2021: Judgment: Part One
John Lennon wrote about imagining a world with no possessions, countries or religions. I wonder if we can imagine a...
October 2021: Parenting and Capitalism
I am always interested in the things that we believe without questioning. For example, we believe that it is better to...
September 2021: COVID
Hopefully, by the time this comes out September 1st, things will have calmed down a bit in our world. As I write this,...
August 2021: The Need for Validation
From my perspective, there are so many ways that traditional parenting compromises our emotional well being as...
July 2021: Gaming is Not an Addiction
ADDICTION? In the current parenting world, a major issue is "screen time" and gaming. Parents will commonly use the...
June 2021: The Best Classrooms for Self-Reflection
There are so many terrific ways for us to learn about ourselves, and when we have the courage to genuinely...
May 2021: Stay Away From the Empty Well
I believe with all my heart that we are perfect the moment we are conceived. What I mean is we are, by definition, the...
April 2021: Give Yourself a Break!
One of the many things I love about my job is the amazing people I get to meet (and who I probably would not have...
March 2021: What aren’t we Questioning?
Thanks to my favourite podcast, now called "Build for Tomorrow" (formerly Pessimists' Archive) I have learned that...
February 2021: Empowerment
One of the most powerful things we can do as parents is to empower our children. Children define their capabilities...
January 2021: Competence, Self-Determination and Alienation
There is a principal in law usually called "Gillick Competency". It is named for a 1985 case in England where a child...
December 2020: COVID and Mindfulness
As this very strange and unprecedented year draws to a close, I've been thinking about what emotional lemonade we can...
November 2020: The Meaning of ‘Mum’ and ‘Dad’
Most of us, even when we are well and truly adults, refer to our parents as "Mum" and "Dad" (or something similar). ...
October 2020: What is “Mental Health”?
It is so interesting to me how our entire society has adopted the phrase "mental health" without really examining what...
September 2020: Reflection on School Uniforms: Part 2
School uniforms carry overt messages about conformity, compliance and lack of individuality. But they also carry...
August 2020: Reflection of School Uniform: Part 1
For most children, school is the place they transition to after spending most of their first 4-5 years with their...

