Philosophy & Values

At The Parenting Centre, we have enormous respect for the people with whom we work. We do not use a “medical model” and do not seek to label anyone. We see counselling as an opportunity for people to get in touch with their own power to create a life of joy and peace.  We believe seeking counselling is a sign of strength, and a sign of dedication to making your life the very best it can be. 

Why The Parenting Centre Exists

Through a lifetime of advocating for children, Dr. Bob saw the need to establish a centre dedicated to assisting and empowering children and young people, by helping parents access their tremendous power. Dr. Bob’s work with individual adults and couples is aimed at assisting people to listen to their own “inner child”, and treat themselves with love and respect.

The Parenting Centre Model

Parenting is the major factor in how we develop. Traditional parenting has created a world of adults who are anxious, have poor self-esteem, have difficulty forming lasting relationships, and are always looking for things to change before they can be happy. The Parenting Centre’s non-traditional model is about embracing “what is” instead of always wanting something different, and helping clients to find peace and happiness.

 

     

     

     

    Quotes 

    “To see people in terms of pathology or to see them in terms of competence is a matter of choice rather than one of truth.”  De Jong & Kim Berg, 2002

    “Washing one’s hands of the conflict between the powerful and the powerless means to side with the powerful, not to be neutral.”  Paulo Freire

    “To be true as the tide, free as a windswell, joyful and loving in letting it be.”  John Denver

    “If you design a system to do something specific, don’t be surprised if it does it. If you run an educational system based on standardisation and conformity that suppresses individuality, imagination, and creativity, don’t be surprised if that’s what it does.”  Ken Robinson

    “Come be how you want to, and see how bright we shine.”  WICKED Musical

     

    “If human evolution is not a mistake, it’s only because great thinkers eventually learn to stop thinking.”  Dr. Bob Jacobs

     

    From the movie version of The Grapes of Wrath (John Steinbeck novel – 1940).  This is what Tom Joad (Henry Fonda) tells his mother as he says good bye for the final time, and she knows she will never see him again:

    “A fellow ain’t got a soul of his own, just little piece of a big soul, the one big soul that belongs to everybody, then… Then it don’t matter. I’ll be all around in the dark – I’ll be everywhere. Wherever you can look – wherever there’s a fight, so hungry people can eat, I’ll be there. Wherever there’s a cop beatin’ up a guy, I’ll be there. I’ll be in the way guys yell when they’re mad. I’ll be in the way kids laugh when they’re hungry and they know supper’s ready, and when the people are eatin’ the stuff they raise and livin’ in the houses they build – I’ll be there, too.”

     

    “You can change everything without changing anything.”  Dr. Bob Jacobs

     

    “Every child is precious. The Lotus Sutra tells the parable of the three kinds of medicinal herbs and two kinds of trees. There are many different kinds of plants; their shape, size and nature come in myriad varieties. Some plants grow fast while others take time to mature. In this parable, however, the heavens rain upon all the plants equally, nurturing their growth. And the plants blossom and bear fruits according to their own unique character. This parable symbolizes the Buddha’s vast compassion to nuture all living beings despite their differences. All children are different; each possess his or her wonderful unique quality. We must pour upon all children our great love and compassion so that each child can blossom, true to his or her unique quality.”  Daisaku Ikeda

    “History is written by those who have hanged heroes.”  Braveheart Film

    “Everybody is a genius.  But if you judge a fish by its’ ability to climb a tree, it will live its’ whole life believing it is stupid.”   Albert Einstein

     

     

     

    Poems

    No One Else – By Elaine Larson

    Someone else can tell you how to multiply by three
    And someone else can tell you how to spell Schenectady
    And someone else can tell you how to ride a two-wheeled bike
    But no one else, no, no one else can tell you what to like

    An engineer can tell you how to run a railroad train
    A map can tell you where to find the capital of Spain
    A book can tell you all the names of every star above
    But no one else, no, no one else can tell you who to love

    Your aunt Louise can tell you how to plant a pumpkin seed
    Your cousin Frank can tell you how to catch a centipede
    Your mom and dad can tell you how to brush between each meal
    But no one else, no, no one else can tell you how to feel

    For how you feel is how you feel
    And all the whole world through
    No one else, no, no one else
    Knows that as well as you!

    The Laws of God, The Laws of Man By A.E. Housman

    The laws of God, the laws of man,

    He may keep that will and can;

    Not I: let God and man decree

    Laws for themselves and not for me;

    And if my ways are not as theirs

    Let them mind their own affairs.

    Their deeds I judge and much condemn,

    Yet when did I make laws for them?

    Please yourselves, say I, and they

    Need only look the other way.

    But no, they will not; they must still

    Wrest their neighbor to their will,

    And make me dance as they desire

    With jail and gallows and hell-fire.

    And how am I to face the odds

    Of man’s bedevilment and God’s?

    I, a stranger and afraid

    In a world I never made

     

     

    The Parenting Centre Core Values

    • Each young person is unique and should be celebrated for who they are.
    • All beings are entitled to be treated with dignity, respect and honour, and to live free from violence of any kind.
    • Young people who are different or don’t “fit in” are not “sick”.
    • Behavioural diversity is as positive to our world as cultural or ethnic diversity.
    • Young people’s voices deserve to be heard and taken seriously.
    • Barring absolute medical necessity, young people should not be given drugs until they are capable of giving informed consent.
    • Parents are not the “problem” but can often be the “solution”.
    • Even after separation, parents remain the most important people in their children’s lives and it is up to them to make the co-parenting regime work.