One of the many things I love about my job is the amazing people I get to meet (and who I probably would not have encountered in the “outside world”). Everyday I get to work with people who are bravely confronting all the things in their past that have resulted in self-doubt, self-consciousness and self-deprecation. We are all actually born perfect, and all the messages that we get otherwise are because of other peoples’ “stuff”. Unfortunately, we take it on board as information about ourselves, and it becomes the basis of how we view who we are.
This foundation of how we see ourselves, and how we see the world, is the very basis of why the world looks different through everyone’s eyes. We all have our unique individual “phenomenology”. It was developed over many, many years.
When we are in therapy, we are trying to chip away at this foundation and get back to recognizing, celebrating and honouring the perfect being we always were. But this is a long and slow process. Occasionally people in therapy will get frustrated with themselves for slipping into old thought patterns or old behaviours. I want to say to everyone in that situation: “Give Yourself A Break”! Consider that instead of being annoyed with yourself for “slip ups” you can use every slip up as an opportunity to give yourself a heartfelt pat on the back for all the courageous work you’ve done, and continue to do. Every glass is half full and half empty at the same time, and we can always choose to lament how much of a journey remains, or celebrate how far we have come. And thank you to those human beings who are willing to let me share their journeys with them.